Double Success
Success in recovery
Tish Morris celebrated a double success in becoming student of the year, on top of receiving her City and Guilds Progression Award in Community Justice for Drug and Alcohol Services. Ms Morris, a recovering alcoholic for more than three years, said: ’Winning the award has given me self-belief and self-assurance in my abilities. I now have the confidence to further my studies, specifically in the field of human rights, which means I can play a continuing role in helping others.’
Elizabeth Flegg , workforce development manager for West Sussex DAAT, set up the training with Chichester College and Sussex Downs College, set up placements with local services, and arranged to sponsor students. She nominated Ms Morris for her £500 national student of the year prize. Pat Arculus, West Sussex County Council cabinet member for adults’ services, congratulated Ms Flegg ’for making this possible, not only for Tish, but for many others in the county’.
From Drink and Drugs newsletter
Female Alcoholics Suffer More
Women Alcoholics Have More Physical, Mental Problems than Males
A new study shows that women alcoholics suffer more physical, mental and social problems than male alcoholics, the Associated Press reported.
The 18-month study by researchers at the University of Michigan and Washington University looked at 444 people from St. Louis, Mo., who had been diagnosed as alcoholics.
- The study found that 52 percent of female alcoholics reported disruption of regular activities because of physical health problems, compared with 23 percent of men.
- In addition, 66 percent of women drinkers said that physical or emotional problems interfered with normal social activity, compared with 27 percent of men.
- The study also showed that 28 percent of women alcoholics said they reduced time on regular activities because of emotional problems, compared with 7 percent of men.
“The women alcoholics were much more likely to report having depression, and having depression that interfered with their daily lives,” said Kyle L. Grazier, a professor at the Michigan School of Public Health who co-authored the study with Kathleen Bucholz of Washington University.
Dr. Barbara Dickie, associate professor at Harvard Medical School, theorized that the difference between men’s bodies and women’s bodies is connected to the way they react differently to alcoholism.
“When you talk about having too much to drink, it has to do with body weight and metabolism. Women metabolize alcohol differently,” Dickie said.
The study also revealed similarities between both sexes. According to Grazier, both men and women alcoholics were just as likely to stay in bed all day because of the addiction. They also were just as likely to seek and receive treatment.
From Join Together Online
See also;
 |
Women Pioneers in 12 Step Recovery by Joan Zieger |
Twice fooled
Twice fooled
"A series of circumstances brought me to a new doctor. I had to see a doctor because once again I had become fearfully ill, and I was unable to work. My stomach was distended, and my ankles were swollen nearly twice their normal size due to fluid retention. The whites of my eyes had yellowed from jaundice, I had spidery broken veins all over my body, my skin itched all over and took on an eerie greenish-gray appearance. My blood had apparently thinned, because the lightest touch would cause a terrible bruise and even a small scratch would bleed for a very long time. Dark marks appeared on my face and arms, my hair began to fall out, and because I had no appetite at all, I was very weak and extremely fatigued. The new physician took one look at my appearance and my blood test results, and asked if I drank. I said that I used to but had abstained for quite a while. This was a blatant lie.
"In reality the only person who was being fooled was me."
Alcoholics Anonymous, pgs. 472-473, 2001 AAWS, Inc., Fourth Edition;
10 Reasons for Low Libido
People in recovery may experience a sudden drop in their libido.
If your erotic life has gone from an all-out sexfest to a G-rated event, you are not alone. While chronic aversion to sex is a serious issue for both men and women, an occasional drop in your sex drive is perfectly normal.
According to a 1994 University of Chicago National Health and Social Life Survey, lack of interest in sex was the number one complaint of sexually active people of all ages. The reasons for a lowered sex drive can vary from person to person. But the following will help you sort out the sources that might be taking the X out of your sex.
- Stress
The work on your desk keeps piling up and your latest dot-com investment just took a nosedive. When stressful events take over, they suck the sexual energy right out of you.
- Illness
You won’t be feeling too sexy when your nose is running and the pile of Kleenex next to your bed keeps growing exponentially. Likewise, PMS may leave you temporarily uninterested in sex. But more serious illnesses such as hypothyroidism, diabetes, cancer, heart and lung disorders, and STI’s may also be responsible for the drop in your sex drive. If you suspect something more serious, make an appointment with your medical professional.
- Medication
Many prescription and over-the-counter drugs can decrease your sexual appetite. Well-documented sex drive crushers include antidepressants such as Prozac and Xanax but medication for hypertension, psychotropic drugs, sedatives, opiates and even birth control pills can lessen your interest in sex or make reaching orgasm difficult.
- Lifestyle
If you’ve recently married, ended a relationship, changed jobs or moved, you may be mentally and physically out of sorts. Lifestyle changes are yet another form of stress, and even if they are positive ones, they can sometimes adversely affect your sex life.
- Aging
While some studies have revealed that sexual responsiveness may get better with age, hormonal imbalances in perimenopausal and menopausal women lead to a diminished sex drive. Some women may experience an aversion to touch, and intercourse may be painful due to vaginal dryness caused by a drop in estrogen.
- Relationship Blues
Temporary disinterest in your partner is normal. But if you’re finding that the seesaw of sexual desire is grounded on the down side for an extended period of time, it could be tied to relationship issues. If there’s tension or unhappiness in your relationship, it will eventually show up in your sex life.
- Body Image
Learning to love your body is probably one of the greatest hurdles to developing a strong sense of sexuality. If you feel uncomfortable with your physical self, you may hide your body from your partner, which can lead to a slow down in sexual activity.
- Depression
If you are depressed, sex will not be at the top of your agenda. Everyone experiences a bad day or two, but if those weeks turn into months, your depressed state will put your sexual interest on hold.
- New Baby
In addition to a new small person demanding your constant attention, lactation and postpartum depression (which occurs in about 10% of women) can contribute to a low libido. The lower estrogen level in lactating women is known not only to lower the sex drive, but can dry the vaginal walls, making intercourse painful.
- Drugs and Alcohol
Excessive consumption of drugs and/or alcohol may increase the quantity of your sexual encounters, but in the long run it can take its toll on your sex drive. Be aware if your drop in libido seems to correlate to an increase in alcohol or drug consumption.
If a lack of sexual interest is bringing you down, there are steps you can take to boost your sex drive.
- A healthy diet, the right amount of exercise and a daily dose of fresh air can help whet your sexual appetite.
- Allowing yourself to explore a new erotic desire or fantasy can spark newfound interest in sex.
- Talking about your sexual discontent with a trusted friend, your partner, an online support group or a good therapist can help you sort out some of the emotional or psychological issues that might be causing you grief.
- Sexual disinterest that stems from a physical problem, such as a hormone imbalance, or depression, may need to be treated with medication. Contact your healthcare provider for an exam and consultation.
Whatever the reason for your sex drive troubles, remember this: Low libido is a natural part of the human sexual response cycle — what goes up, must come down.
From Sexual Health
See also;
 |
I’d Rather Eat Chocolate: Learning to Love My Low Libido by Joan Sewell |
Vibrator use is OK, Improves Sexual Health
Two Indiana University studies conducted among nationally representative samples of adult American men and women show that vibrator use during sexual interactions is common, with use being reported by approximately 53 percent of women and 45 percent of men ages 18 to 60. Not only is vibrator use common, but the two studies also show that vibrator use is associated with more positive sexual function and being more proactive in caring for one’s sexual health.
Men and Women use Vibrators Equally
One study surveyed women. The other surveyed men. Both were published this week by the Journal of Sexual Medicine, a leading peer-reviewed journal in the area of urology and sexual health.
"The study about women’s vibrator use affirms what many doctors and therapists have known for decades — that vibrator use is common, it’s linked to positive sexual function such as desire and ease of orgasm, and it’s rarely associated with any side effects," said Debby Herbenick.
"The study about male vibrator use is important because it shows that vibrator use is also common among men, something that has not been documented before," Reece said.
The studies are the first to document insights into how and why people use vibrators, examine side effects and to explore associations with sexual health behaviors, sexual enjoyment and quality of life measures.
Here are some of the findings from the studies, which involve survey responses from 2,056 women and 1,047 men ages 18-60.
For women:
- More than half of the women (52.5 percent) had used a vibrator with nearly one in four having done so in the past month.
- Vibrator users were significantly more likely to have had a gynaecological exam during the past year and to have performed genital self-examination during the previous month.
- Vibrator use was positively related to several aspects of sexual function (desire, arousal, lubrication, orgasm, pain and overall function) with recent vibrator users scoring themselves higher on most sexual function domains, suggesting more positive sexual function.
- Most women (71.5 percent) reported having never experienced any side effects associated with vibrator use. Those side effects that were reported were typically rare and of a short duration.
For men:
- The prevalence of men who had incorporated a vibrator into sexual activities during their lives was 44.8 percent, with no statistical differences between the rates of vibrator use between men who identified as heterosexual and those who identified as gay or bisexual.
- Heterosexual men most commonly reported having used vibrators during foreplay or intercourse with a female partner, with 91 percent of those who had used a vibrator reporting that they had done so during such activities with women.
- Of men who have used vibrators, 10 percent had done so in the past month, 14.2 percent in the past year and 20.5 percent more than one year ago.
- Men who reported having used vibrators, particularly those with more recent use, were more likely to report participation in sexual health promoting behaviors, such as testicular self-exam.
- Men who had used vibrators recently also scored themselves higher on four of the five domains of sexual function, as measured by the International Index of Erectile Function (erectile function, intercourse satisfaction, orgasmic function and sexual desire).
The study specifically sought to establish nationally representative rates of vibrator use among men and women in the United States. Vibrators are electrical devices that produce pulses of variable amplitude and frequency to enhance sexual arousal in men and women by stimulating the genitals. Marketed widely to women through the Internet, women’s magazines, boutiques and in-home sex toy parties, they also are available in drug stores and other mainstream retailers.
- Research reports: Herbenick, D., Reece, M., Sanders, S.A., Dodge, B., Ghassemi, A., & Fortenberry, J.D. (2009). Prevalence and characteristics of vibrator use by women in the United States: Results from a nationally representative study. Journal of Sexual Medicine, 6, 1857-1866.
- Reece, M., Herbenick, D., Sanders, S.A., Dodge, B., Ghassemi, A., & Fortenberry, J.D. (2009). Prevalence and characteristics of vibrator use by men in the United States. Journal of Sexual Medicine, 6, 1867-1874.
See also;
For Yourself : The Fulfillment of Female SexualityAlcoholics Anonymous is self-help
Alcoholics Anonymous is self-help, not treatment
Alcoholics Anonymous is not really a treatment for alcoholism but a community resource for those wishing to stop drinking. Uncontrolled studies of AA have shown that people who affiliate with AA tend to stop drinking and find that their lives improve in many respects (Emrick et al. 1993).
However, evaluating AA alongside professionally delivered interventions presents problems and perhaps should not be done.
AA, the original 12 Step program, is not a fixed form of “treatment†and people are free to participate in different ways. Some go a few times and then drop out. Others go more often, but do not actively participate in meetings or “work the program.â€
It is possible that both dropouts and passive participants gain some benefit from the AA experience, but this has not been adequately researched. Only a minority of those ever exposed to AA seem to become full, active members over a long period and consistently “work†all the steps.
There is evidence that certain types of people may be more likely to fully affiliate with AA than others (Ogborne and Glaser, 1981; Emrick et al., 1993), but more research is needed and some studies may no longer be relevant given the current range and diversity of AA groups. However, it seems likely that AA would appeal to those who have experienced serious alcohol-related problems and who can accept the need for abstinence and the term “alcoholicâ€.
When professionals refer clients to AA, as adjunctive therapy, on the assumption that they will benefit from such referrals, it is reasonable to ask about the outcomes of these referrals and to compare these outcomes with those achieved by other means.
Project MATCH (1997) included a 12-step facilitation intervention and results showed that those who were encouraged to go to AA did as well as those provided with other interventions.
‘Drunkorexics’
They are calling it “drunkorexia” and while it is not a strict medical term, dietitians believe there is a link between binge drinking and eating disorders.
The phenomenon first spotted in the cocktail bars of New York has now crossed the Atlantic to Britain and affects mostly weight-conscious women who offset the calories from heavy drinking by skipping meals.
Realising that they’re going to drink heavily and not wanting to put on any weight (two large glasses of white wine contain 300 calories, the same as a Snickers chocolate bar) “drunkorexics” will starve themselves in preparation for a night on the town.
Experts say the “drunkorexic” demographic comprises mainly young women, many of whom experience a combination of social pressures at university. “At university there is huge pressure to drink and also to look thin. In my experience many young women find the only way they can cope with both is to drink rather than eat, to substitute alcohol for food”, says Louise Noble, chief dietitian to the Berkshire Healthcare Trust
Full story at the Independent
The Psalm of the Addict
The Psalm of the Addict
King Heroin is my shepherd, I shall always want.
He maketh me to lie down in the gutters.
He leadeth me beside the troubled waters.
He destroyeth my soul.
He leadeth me in the paths of wickedness for the effort’s sake.
Yea, I shall walk through the valley of poverty and will fear all evil for thou,
Heroin, art with me.
Thy Needle and capsule try to comfort me.
Thou strippest the table of groceries in the presence of my family.
Thou robbest my head of reason.
My cup of sorrow runneth over.
Surely heroin addiction shall stalk me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the House of the Damned forever.
From; Author unknown,
Death by Heroin: Recovery by Hope
Sex and Love Addiction Recovery links
Codependents of Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous
12 step support group for the recovery of family, friends, and significant others whose lives have been affected by their relationship with someone addicted to sex and love. COSLAA is a confidential recovery fellowship for members, age 18+, who have been affected by another’s sexually addictive behaviors, such as visits to strip clubs, obsessive use of pornography, internet sex, voyeurism, phone sex, or serial infidelity. Only requirement for membership is a desire to stop living out a pattern of codependency to someone who is sexually addicted. any relationship and sexual orientation included. Not open to sex and love addicts.
Augustine Fellowship, Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous
12-step fellowship based for those who desire to stop living out a pattern of sex and love addiction, obsessive/compulsive sexual behavior or emotional attachment. Newsletter, journal, information and referrals, conferences, phone support. Group development guidelines ($10).
S-Anon
12-step group for persons who have a friend or family member with a problem of sexual addiction. Assistance available for starting groups. Conferences. Quarterly newsletter ($14).
Sexual Compulsives Anonymous
Fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from sexual compulsion. Based on 12-step recovery model. Newsletter, information and referrals, phone support, conferences. Guidelines for starting similar groups.
Sexaholics Anonymous
Program of recovery for those who want to stop sexually self-destructive thinking and behavior. Mutual support to achieve and maintain sexual sobriety. Telephone network, quarterly newsletter, literature and books. Guidelines to help start a similar group.
Sex Addicts Anonymous
Fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength, and hope with each other so they may overcome their sexual addiction or dependency. Open to all who share a desire to stop compulsive sexual behavior. Bi-monthly newsletter.
COSA (Codependents Of Sex Addicts)
A Self-help program of recovery using the 12 steps adapted from A.A. and Al-Anon, for those involved in relationships with people who have compulsive sexual behavior. Assistance in starting new groups. Newsletter ($24).
Sexual Recovery Anonymous
Fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover. Online referrals, literature, and support also available. For those with a desire to stop compulsive sexual behavior.
ACOA & Step 5
Last week I did a step 5 with the focus on my ACOA issues.
Boy am I feeling it.
After 4 hours, one of the comments my sponsor said was ’Most of those things
relate to being rejected’.
And it was. Right back as far as I can remember, about age 4 and a half, and
almost anything since – I perceived everything as rejection of me. And I
ended up with the view of myself as being unworthy, rejectable; and of
course ’I deserve’ to be put down, critisised and not needed.
The important thing to me is that these thoughts may only be ’perceptions’,
not reality.
My thinking since has been split between ’at least I now know’ and
depression – what a waste my life has been stuck in thinking I am no good.
It’s almost like being paranoid about thinking every incident being set up
to reject me. And, I set myself up to be rejected.
My positive, spiritual thoughts are; ’I may or may not have been rejected,
that’s not important. What is important it seems to me is changing my
thoughts and self-talk to ’I am OK, even if I am rejected’.
I have been reading Step 6 in the AA 12 steps and 12 traditions book every
day and that is opening my mind to just how much this twisted thinking is
embedded in my mind.
Any thoughts you have on these subjects will be read with interest.
