Sparrow, Author at Recovery Is Sexy.com

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Posted on May 20, 2013 at 7:13 pm by Sparrow

Because relapse is most common in the first years of recovery—leveling off at about five years—Faulkner cautions that those who are sober be cautious about dating people who imbibe. “If you’re talking about someone with good sobriety dating someone who is a casual or responsible drinker, there isn’t necessarily a problem,” she says. “If the sober person is in early recovery or if the drinker is a problem drinker, the chances for a good dating experience are dim. Though most people won’t wait two years into sobriety to start dating, keep in mind that the smell of alcohol, the taste of a kiss [with someone who’s been drinking], the clinking of ice in the glass, as well as the bar and the bar scene could be triggers.”

Full story via Dating People Who Drink | The Fix.

Stress and Alcoholism Recovery

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The impact of stress does not cease once an alcoholic stops drinking. [Stress and Alcoholism]

NB; This article is a bit technical, but as it covers the latest research (2013) and it provides important data about stress and alcoholism.

Newly sober alcoholics often relapse to drinking to alleviate the symptoms of withdrawal, such as alcohol craving, feelings of anxiety, and difficulty sleeping. Many of these symptoms of withdrawal can be traced to the hypothalamic–pituitary–adrenal (HPA) axis, the bodies system at the core of the stress response.

As shown in figure 1, long-term, heavy drinking can actually alter the brain’s chemistry, re-setting what is “normal.” It causes the release of higher amounts of cortisol and adrenocorticotropic hormone. When this hormonal balance is shifted, it impacts the way the body perceives stress and how it responds to it. For example, a long-term heavy drinker may experience higher levels of anxiety when faced with a stressful situation than someone who never drank or who drank only moderately.

In addition to being associated with negative or unpleasant feelings, cortisol also interacts with the brain’s reward or “pleasure” systems. Researchers believe this may contribute to alcohol’s reinforcing effects, motivating the drinker to consume higher levels of alcohol in an effort to achieve the same effects.

Cortisol also has a role in cognition [thinking], including learning and memory. In particular, it has been found to promote habit-based learning, which fosters the development of habitual drinking and increases the risk of relapse. Cortisol also has been linked to the development of psychiatric disorders (such as depression) and metabolic; biological changing process disorders.

These findings have significant implications for recovery by the alcoholic. The recovering alcoholics is advised by Alcoholics Anonymous to; 1/ Go to more meetings, 2/ Call your sponsor, 3/ Don’t pick up a drink, 4/ Read AA literature, 5/ Talk with other members, 6/ Appeal to your Higher Power. .

Researchers recommend treating PTSD and other illnesses and alcohol use disorders simultaneously rather than waiting until after patients have been abstinent from alcohol or drugs for a sustained period.

Medications also are currently being investigated for alcoholism that work to stabilize the body’s response to stress. Some scientists believe that restoring balance to the stress-response system may help alleviate the problems associated with withdrawal and, in turn, aid in recovery. More work is needed to determine the effectiveness of these medications.

Conclusion

Although the link between stress and alcoholism use has been recognized for some time, it has become particularly relevant in recent years as combat Veterans, many with PTSD, strive to return to civilian lifestyles. In doing so, some turn to alcohol as a way of coping.

Unfortunately, alcohol use itself exacts a psychological and physiological toll on the body and may actually compound the effects of stress. More research is needed to better understand how alcohol alters the brain and the various circuits involved with the HPA axis. Powerful genetic models and brain-imaging techniques, as well as an improved understanding of how to translate research using animals to the treatment of humans, should help researchers to further define the complex relationship between stress and alcohol.

The AA ‘six pack’ to combat stress and alcoholism in recovery;

1/ Go to more meetings,
2/ Call your sponsor,
3/ Don’t pick up a drink,
4/ Read AA literature,
5/ Talk with other members,
6/ Appeal to your Higher Power. .

You can read the full article from NIAAA by downloading this PDF file.

alcohol and stress.pdf

Women Are Not Different

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I am one of the many women that has been restored to sanity through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

I began drinking at the age of 17 years, and found alcohol to be a wonderful stimulant which enabled me to feel relaxed in any given situation. Whether alone, or in a crowd, I have always felt inwardly isolated from people and alcohol managed to break down this barrier, for brief periods of time.

Being restless by nature, I searched always for the excitements that life could bring and alcohol was always my companion. But Alcohol was a temporary solution to my problem. Since coming to AA in January 74, I’ve learned that my problem is alcoholism. Also, that alcoholism is in the person, and not in the bottle. I drank for 20 years before stumbling through the doors of AA, mentally, physically and spiritually bankrupt. Alcohol had become a depressant rather than a stimulant. I became a social outcast through my change of personality, which caused fits of violence and deep depression.

Laughter and happiness had long since passed in their place were feelings of utter despair and bottomless loneliness. Through alcoholism I built a wall around me, which shut me away from the realities of life and I proceeded to live in a world of fantasy. I was a stranger and nonentity in my own home. I knew I was surely going insane through my obsession for alcohol. Fortunately for me, I had a moment of truth and I rang A.A. I admitted and accepted myself as being an alcoholic. I knew that the road before me would not be easy, but I also knew I would not have to walk that road alone. Finally, I had met people who really understood me and accepted me for all of my failings.

I was not a bad person trying to be good, but a sick person trying to get well.

When I look back on myself, as a practising alcoholic, it’s like seeing a total stranger. Sobriety through A.A. has brought the love and respect of my family.

But more importantly, I now have respect for myself. The A.A. Program enables me to live one day at a time without alcohol. I want sobriety as much today, as I did when I first came to A.A. I’ve also learned that the only way I can keep what I have, is to give it away, to those still suffering.

Unity and service in A.A. is of great importance to my sobriety. The gratitude and love I feel for this fellowship cannot be measured in words. If I don’t take that first drink, on a daily basis, then each 24 hours can only progressively get better. I believe today that I have been restored to sanity through the I2 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

My communication with my Higher Power came through these moments of turmoil, where, just speaking to another person didn’t seem to be the complete solution.

Firstly, my only communication with my Higher Power was at these particular times of trouble. But gradually, I began conversing at times when everything was going smoothly. Communication is important in any relationship.

Unity in family depends on just this as does any human relationship. If we don’t discuss and talk to our fellow man then one can once again become alienated. So it’s logical to suppose that communication is important with a Higher Power. This is done quietly when-one is alone. There can and are times also, when contact has to be made to face and overcome an unexpected emotional turmoil. At these particular times, I have found it comforting to quickly say to myself “Give me thy strength, as I have so little” or “Thy will, not mine.” These words have been enough to quickly calm me and allow rational thought to re-appear.

It allows me time to take two steps back and review the situation. At times like these I’ve called on my Higher Power and found I need only ask and help is there for me. The ground work is then up to me.

Communication with my Higher Power is now becoming a regular part of my daily living. I can now converse without any embarrassment or reservations. My fellow man and my Higher Power are a necessary part of my recovery.

AA Humility

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Humility – the most misunderstood virtue in the Fellowship of AA.

To many AA’s the humble invoke a picture of a plainly dressed self-deprecating person, admitting to the possession of no particular talent’ usually taking the last inconspicuous place and being a doormat for everyone.

This certainly is not a true picture of a humble person.

No, if you are looking for a person who has true humility in the Fellowship of AA, look for a person who is at ease with his Higher Power, his fellow alcoholic and himself. He does not try to ingratiate himself with the famous or wealthy. He has developed great tolerance, patience and under standing with the ignorant, the flighty and the irresponsible.

He is generous with his time and his talents and his material things. Why? Because he knows he must answer to his Higher Power for the use of the gifts entrusted to him and he must give an accounting… he is compassionate and patient toward the occasional “slipper,” for he is constantly aware of the fact that he has been given a measure of Grace.

He has found the miracle of joyous living in giving. In giving of himself without any hope of material reward, he has found the secret of a humble, yet happy life the more you give of yourself unselfishly in helping others your reward is peace of mind past describing. May all of us remember this peace of mind will only remain as long as we remain humbly aware of the real source of the priceless gift – the Higher Power.

Author unknown

Twisted morality ;-)

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vector image of smiley on key

Always remember you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.
Do not walk beside me either.
Just pretty much leave me alone.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it…
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and get slapped on the ass…then things get worse.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
There is a fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”
No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday…around age 11.
Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Live With Enthusiasm

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Youth is a state of mind, your only as young as you think and feel; your spiritual age depends on your attitude.

By – Samuel Ullman

Youth is not a time of life. It’s a state of mind. It’s a temper of the will, a quality of the imagination, a vigour of the emotions, a predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite for adventure over love of ease.

Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years. People grow old only by deserting their ideals. Years wrinkle the skin but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul.

Worry, doubt, self-distrust, fear and despair – these bow the head and turn the growing spirit back to dust.

Whether 60 or I6, there is in every being’s heart the love of wonder’ the sweet amazement at the stars and the starlike things and thoughts, the undaunted challenge of events, the unfailing childlike appetite for what-next, and the joy of the game of living.

You are as young as your faith, as old as your doubt; as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fear as young as your hope, as old as your despair.

So long as your heart receives messages of beauty, cheer, courage, grandeur and power from the earth, from man and from the Infinite, so long are you young.

When the wires are all down’ and all the central places of your heart are covered with the snows of pessimism and the ice of cynicism, then, and only then, are you grown old indeed, and may God have mercy on your soul “Live every day of your life as though you expect to Live forever “

From “The Summit of Years Four Score”

Breaking Free from Depression

New book by University of Louisville professor enables reader to develop personalized anti-depression plan

A new book co-authored by the director of the University of Louisville Depression Center recognizes that depression is different for everyone and provides techniques and strategies for each person to develop a personalized action plan to combat depression.

“Breaking Free from Depression: Pathways to Wellness (The Guilford Self-Help Workbook Series)” is available in paperback now. An e-book version is currently being developed.

Its authors are Dr. Jesse Wright, director of the University of Louisville Depression Center and professor of psychiatry, and his daughter, Dr. Laura McCray, a family physician with the University of Vermont. They have seen thousands of clinically depressed patients in their practices and understand that there is no one-size-fits-all universal cure.

The book provides six treatment methods for depression and is written so that readers can put together a personalized plan that works best for each individual. The book contains worksheets, questionnaires and exercises that will help guide readers to learn what is truly helpful to them in developing a treatment plan for depression.

“There are many different paths that lead to depression and equally as many paths that can be taken to wellness,” Wright said. “Fortunately, you do not have to choose one path out of depression. You can combine ideas and methods from more than one perspective on depression to craft a plan that works best for you.”

Mental health providers have long believed that self-management is a key to successfully dealing with depression and Wright and McCray present evidence-based strategies for doing so in clear, compassionate language. Options from antidepressant drugs and behavior techniques to diet and lifestyle changes and spiritual resources are outlined in the book.

“Each of the paths is based on a different way of understanding depression and overcoming it,” Wright said. “Whatever ‘itinerary’ you choose, this book will help you overcome roadblocks that have prevented you from achieving wellness in the past.”

“This invaluable guide, written by a psychiatrist and a family doctor, is unique in its balanced coverage of psychotherapy, medication and other treatments for depression. It is clearly written and chock-full of tips and resources. If you suffer from depression, this is the best single book I’ve seen for you and your family,” said Dr. Michael E. Thase, co-author of “Beating the Blues.”

###

About the authors

Jesse H. Wright holds both M.D. and Ph.D. degrees and is well-known in the psychiatric profession as an authority on depression and cognitive behavioral therapy. He has authored award-winning books for both mental health professionals and the general public. He was founding president of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy, is a Fellow of the American College of Psychiatrists and is a past recipient of UofL’s Distinguished Educator of the Year Award.

Laura W. McCray is an M.D. who practices family medicine in Burlington, Vt., with a focus on mental health in primary care. She is clinical assistant professor of family medicine and associate director of the Family Medicine Residency Program at the University of Vermont. She is a recipient of family medicine teaching awards both at the University of Vermont and the University of Pennsylvania.

Breaking Free from Depression: Pathways to Wellness (The Guilford Self-Help Workbook Series)

Recovery Creed – Just For To-Day

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JUST FOR TO-DAY

Russ Tyson, well-known Australian radio and TV personality, in his 1973 book “The Best of Russ Tyson” (Melbourne : Lansdowne) with the subtitle of “Alcoholics Creed” sets out the nine paragraphs of JUST FOR TO-DAY,

Many non-alcoholics who have read this feel that there is a good philosophy there for everyone alcoholic or not.

Long before I seriously tried to understand and practice AA’s Twelve Steps, these nine paragraphs helped me tidy up my thinking, quieted my behaviour and lifted my attitude by following one paragraph each day

In each paragraph there is the positive “I will do something” and in front of them are the words “I will try”. Early in the piece an older member told me that as long as I only tried to do something positive, that while I was trying’ it was unlikely that I would want to drink.

How right he was. Looking back, not even so far back, I know that the days when things don’t go right when I am depressed tired or bored, cranky and dissatisfied, are the days when I am not trying to do something positive about the program or “Just for to-day.”

By the time I was able to understand a little of the AA philosophy I realised that the positive actions suggested by “Just for to-day” were the exact opposite of my alcoholic behavior when drinking.

JUST FOR TO-DAY

1. I will try to live through this day only, ….

Before AA I never ever thought of the present, my mind was either occupied with wondering what I’d already done or fearful of what the future held.

2, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will be happy, ….

For many years I didn’t know the meaning of the word, I wasn’t happy before, during, or after drinking,

3, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will adjust myself to what is, …..

I always wanted to change the world and everybody in it. Frustration at not being able to do this meant I was always cranky dissatisfied selfish and self-pitying,

4. JUST FOR TO-DAY I will try to strengthen my mind, ….

Mental effort and concentration diminished rapidly in proportion to the amount I drank, If anything rather than strengthen I tried to blot out my mind,

5, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will exercise my soul.

Once I became a compulsive drinker I lost my belief in a soul, I never tried to help anyone, usually the opposite and I always demonstrated loud and long if my feelings were hurt,

6, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will be agreeable, ….

I could not agree with anyone when drinking, I always found fault and became quite voluble about it, Criticism was part and parcel of my every day living destructive criticism.

7, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will have a program, ….

I used to have a program but for the future some day I would stop drinking, My behavior was erratic I couldn’t always make up my mind to do anything constructive and often when I did, I’d often go and do the opposite.

8, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will have a quiet half- hour and relax, ….

Many days I was quiet for much more than a half hour mostly stupefied but never did I relax except into unconsciousness.

9, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will be unafraid, ….

Fear of something bad was always about to happen, fear of the future, fear of what I might have done, fear that I would run out of grog, fear of respectable people, fear of being found out. Fear was my constant companion and in the latter stages of my practising alcoholic days my only companion.

Nothing ever appeared beautiful to me – the world was against me, it was a hell from which I could only escape by drinking to oblivion.

Many years and many AA meetings have gone by, but I still need to follow my JUST FOR TO-DAY card. Complacency and over confidence could soon return me to my hell, could soon reverse the positiveness of the AA philosophy to the misery of a negative alcoholic existence.

Many AA meetings are I hope, still to come. Many things about the AA program and philosophy I still have to learn. Many more times must I practice the Twelve Steps. Many more times must I understand and try to carry the message to the sick alcoholic

And even then, I will not lay aside my JUST FOR TO-DAY Card I may give it to someone who wants it, but I will replace it immediately because just the sight of it helps one to remember that I am still only one drink off being a drunk Bill M.

Dating People Who Drink

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Stress and Alcoholism Recovery

The impact of stress does not cease once an alcoholic stops drinking. [Stress and Alcoholism]

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Women Are Not Different

I am one of the many women that has been restored to sanity through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

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Isolation and Alienation

Communication With A Higher Power

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AA Humility

Humility – the most misunderstood virtue in the Fellowship of AA.

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Twisted morality ;-)

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Live With Enthusiasm

Youth is a state of mind, your only as young as you think and feel; your spiritual age depends on your attitude.

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Breaking Free from Depression

New book by University of Louisville professor enables reader to develop personalized anti-depression plan

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Recovery Creed – Just For To-Day

JUST FOR TO-DAY

JUST FOR TO-DAY

1. I will try to live through this day only, ….

2, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will be happy, ….

3, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will adjust myself to what is, …..

4. JUST FOR TO-DAY I will try to strengthen my mind, ….

5, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will exercise my soul.

6, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will be agreeable, ….

7, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will have a program, ….

8, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will have a quiet half- hour and relax, ….

9, JUST FOR TO-DAY I will be unafraid, ….

From THE PATHFINDER, October 1973, Brisbane, Australia.

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Twelve Step Facilitation

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