In recovery from alcoholism, addiction, co-dependency, compulsive gambling or sex addiction maturity will grow by working the 12 Steps.


The mature person has developed attitudes in relation to themselves and their environment which have lifted them above “childishness” in thought and behaviour.

  • They accept constructive criticism gratefully, being honestly glad for an opportunity to improve.
  • They do not indulge in self-pity.
  • They have begun to feel the laws of compensation operating in all life.
  • They accept the responsibility for their own acts.
  • They do not expect special consideration from anyone.
  • They control their temper.
  • They meet emergencies with poise.
  • Their feelings are not easily hurt.
  • They have out grown the “all or nothing” stage.
  • They recognized that no person or situation is wholly bad or good, and they begin to appreciate the Golden Mean.
  • They are not impatient at reasonable delays.
  • They have learned that they are not the Arbiter of the Universe and that they must often adjust themselves to other people and their convenience.
  • They are a good loser, or winner.
  • They can endure defeat and disappointment without whining or complaining.
  • They do not gloat.
  • They do not worry unduly about things they cannot help.
  • They are not given to boasting or “showing off.”
  • They are honestly glad when others enjoy success or good fortune.
  • They have outgrown envy and jealousy.
  • They are open-minded enough to listen thoughtfully to the opinions of others.
  • They do not become vigorously argumentative when their views are opposed.
  • They are not a chronic “fault-finder” (Inventory taker)
  • They plan things in advance rather than trusting to the inspiration of the moment.
  • In terms of spiritual maturity:
  • They have faith in a power greater than themselves.
  • They feel an organic part of mankind as a whole, contributing their part to each group of which they are a member.
  • They obey the spiritual essence of the Golden Rule.

Related Reading:

Emotions & Essential Oils, 2nd Edition: A Modern Resource for Healing
12 Steps: The Sequel
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions/B-14
The Recovery Book