How Co-Dependency Is Often Experienced

Co-dependent people usually have a state of mind that has a common set of attitudes or psychological approaches to how they relate to their partners.

This seems to be true of co-dependents of alcoholics, addicts, compulsive gamblers, dysfunctional people and dysfunctional families.

My good feelings about who I am stem from being liked by you.
My good feelings about who I am stem from receiving approval from you.
Your struggles affect my serenity.
My sexuality depends on your sexuality.
My mental attention focuses on solving your problems or relieving your pain.
My mental attention is focused on pleasing you.
My mental attention is focused on protecting you.
My mental attention is focused on manipulating you to "to do it my way".
My self-esteem is bolstered by solving your problem.
My self-esteem is bolstered by relieving your pain.
My own hobbies and interests are put aside. My time is spent sharing your interests and hobbies.
Your clothing and personal appearance is dictated by my desires as I feel that you are a reflection of me.
Your behavior is dictated by my desires as I feel that you are a reflection of me.
I am not aware of how I feel. I am aware of how you feel.
I am not aware of what I want. I ask what you want.
If I am not aware i assume.
The dreams that I have for my future are linked to you.
My fear of rejection determines what I say or do.
My fear of your anger determines what I say or do.
I use giving as a way of feeling safe in our relationship.
My social circle diminishes as I involve myself with you.
I put my values aside in order to connect with you.
I value your opinion and way of doing things more than my own.
The quality of my life is in relation to the quality of yours.

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