branch patternNo sex please: An asexual life

Some people in recovery from alcoholism, addiction or co-dependency may not be interested in sex. There may be many reasons for this such as previous abuse, pain or age. Another reason may be that they are ‘asexuality’ – not interested in sexual intercourse. Some may have been submitting to sex throughout their drinking, drugging or relationships without knowing that some people just are not interested naturally. This article may help.

Andy is young and healthy – yet he’s never experienced physical desire. And there are thousands more like him. Olly Bootle meets the asexuals.

At 21, Andy Holland is happy, easy-going and interested in the same things as most university students. With one notable exception: Holland is not attracted to women, or to men. In fact, he has no desire to have sex. And in this, he is not as unusual as we might assume.

The first crush that Tessa Barratt had was on a Transformers toy called Rat Trap. “He was my first heart throb,” she says. The shelves in her bedroom are lined with models of Transformers. Playing with them now, laughs as she admits, “I don’t know how I fell in love with a rat.”

Barratt is now 22. But she’s not that much closer to having what most people would consider a normal, loving relationship: she’s still a virgin.

“It’s hard to imagine what would push me to having sex. I’m not afraid of sex, it’s just not something I want to do. That’s probably why I delve into the world of science fiction and Transformers, where sex isn’t an issue at all.”

Barratt calls herself “asexual”, and says she’s very different to the many people who decide to abstain from sex for religious or moral reasons. “Celibacy is a choice, asexuality is an orientation. It’s not something you choose to be, it’s something you’re born as.”

The facts

  • According to Kinsey’s ‘Sexual Behavior in the Human Male’, 1.5 per cent of the adult male population exhibits “no socio-sexual contacts or reactions”.
  • In ‘Sexual Behavior in the Human Female’, Kinsey argued that up to 19 per cent of the unmarried female population exhibited asexual behaviour or reactions.
  • In 1994, a British study found that 1 per cent of people had never felt any sexual attraction to another person. The same study found that a larger proportion of women than men are asexual.
  • In 1982, a survey of ‘Playboy’ magazine readers found that 2 per cent of respondents were asexual.
  • Possible causes of asexuality include genetic predisposition, hormonal imbalance or childhood experiences.
  • The largest asexuality group on Facebook has 585 members.

Full story at; The Independent

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Related Reading:

Asexuality
Asexualities: Feminist and Queer Perspectives (Routledge Research in Gender and Society)
Asexuality: A Brief Introduction
The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality