S-Anon is a program of recovery for those who have been affected by someone else’s sexual behavior.
What is S-Anon?
The S-Anon Family Groups are a fellowship of the relatives and friends of sexually addicted people who share their experience, strength and hope in order to solve their common problems. Our program of recovery is adapted from Alcoholics Anonymous and is based on the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. S-Anon’s Twelve Concepts of Service provide guidance in serving each other in our business matters. There are no dues or fees for S-Anon membership; we are self-supporting through our own contributions.
S-Anon is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution; it does not wish to engage in any controversy; nor does it endorse or oppose any causes. Our primary purpose is to recover from the effects upon us of another person’s sexaholism and to help the families and friends of sexaholics. We do this by applying the Twelve Steps of S-Anon to our lives and by welcoming and giving comfort to families of sexaholics.
The S-Anon Checklist
1. Have you felt hurt or embarrassed by someone’s sexual conduct?
2. Have you secretly searched for clues about someone’s sexual behavior?
3. Have you lied about or covered up another person’s sexual conduct?
4. Have you had money problems because of someone’s sexual behavior?
5. Have you felt betrayed or abandoned by someone you loved and trusted?
6. Are you afraid to upset the sexaholic for fear that he or she will leave you?
7. Have you tried to control somebody’s sexual thoughts or behavior by doing things like throwing away pornography, dressing suggestively, or being sexual with them in order to keep them from being sexual with others?
8. Have you used sex to try to keep peace in a relationship?
9. Have you tried to convince yourself that someone else’s sexual thoughts and behavior shouldn’t bother you?
10. Have you felt that sex plays an all-consuming role in your relationship?
11. Have you doubted your attractiveness, your emotions, and your sanity?
12. Have you felt responsible for the sexual behavior of another person?
13. Have you felt angry and/or stupid for not knowing about someone’s sexual acting out behavior?
14. Have you engaged in uncomfortable, unwanted, or physically dangerous sexual behavior?
15. Have you ever thought about or attempted suicide because of someone’s sexual behavior?
16. Has your preoccupation with someone’s sexual thoughts and behavior affected your relationships with your children, your co-workers, and/or other friends or family members?
17. Have you neglected your physical and/or emotional health while in a relationship?
18. Have you helped someone get out of jail or other legal trouble, or feared legal action as a result of his or her sexual behavior?
19. Have you blamed other people, such as friends or sexual partners, society in general, his/her job, religion, or birth family for someone’s sexual behavior?
20. Have you felt confused about what is true when talking with someone about his or her sexual thoughts or behavior?
21. Have you avoided painful emotions by using drugs, alcohol, or food or by being too busy?
22. Have you ever felt that someone was inappropriately attracted to you or your children?
23. Have you felt alone or too ashamed to ask for help?
If you can answer “yes” to some of these questions, you may find help in S-Anon.
“Reprinted with permission of S-Anon International Family Groups, Inc., Nashville, TN. Compliance with S-Anon International Family Groups, Inc.’s” © Copyright 1992-2009 by S-Anon International Family Groups.