Comments and silent responses overheard at a recovery meeting.
- “Deb, let’s have lunch tomorrow.” – Why would she want to have lunch with me?
- “Pam, I tried to phone you today.” – No you didn’t, I was home almost all day.
- “Larry, you sure are a kick!” – What did he mean by that?
When we suspect the motives of others, who have done nothing other than to make a friendly comment, we would do well to suspect that we are the one with the problem. When we recognize it’s our insecurity at play here, we can begin to override the negative self-talk with positive talk.
At first we may have to force ourselves to reply, “Yes, I’d love to have lunch,” or “Thank you,” to a compliment. As our self-esteem grows it will become natural and genuine to assume people mean what they say.
I will try not to read negatives into comments by others.
“If you don’t love yourself, nobody else will. Not only that – you won’t be good at loving anyone else. Loving starts with the self.”