In a codependent-alcoholic relationship, individual human rights are not respected, and this is the primary devastating factor to families dealing with alcoholism. This article outlines a code of basic human rights applicable to the non-alcoholic.

You and your children have the right to:

  • a loving and secure relationship based on healthy mutual dependence;
  • peace and harmony in your home;
  • a stable, secure, and nurturing environment conducive to personal growth and self-discovery;
  • a healthy self-concept, knowing you are worthy, valued, and loved;
  • human dignity; to be respected and treated as an individual human being, and not be put down, demoralized, and dehumanized;
  • not live a life of “always waiting for the other shoe to drop,” never knowing whether it will be a soft slipper or steel-toed work boot;
  • a life free of the fear of emotional terrorism, physical abuse, and constant arguing;
  • a life free of nightmares, day terrors, and insecurity;
  • a life free of guilt and shame, and freedom from manipulation through guilt and shame;
  • not be emotionally drained and “all used up” from the rigors of a codependent-alcoholic relationship;
  • use any possible means (short of physical assault) to positively change your own circumstances;
  • leave a physically abusive alcoholic relationship immediately and without advance notice to the alcoholic;
  • leave any relationship that is not healthy and not actively improving;
  • not live life on a roller coaster, going from one alcoholic crisis to another;
  • go to work or school without dragging all the baggage of codependent-alcoholic dysfunction.
  • earn an income and spend money as you choose.

See also

Related Reading:

Facing Codependence: What It Is, Where It Comes from, How It Sabotages Our Lives
Everything I Never Wanted to Be: A Memoir of Alcoholism and Addiction, Faith and Family, Hope and Humor
The Soulmate Experience: A Practical Guide to Creating Extraordinary Relationships
Is Codependency Affecting Your Life? Why Is It So Toxic?